Thursday, May 6, 2010

Less Than A Month Remains...

A roommate I had once asked me this question: "Have you thought of possibly throwing something away at some point?" Was it a comment on the fact that I keep a lot of things? Was it a heartfelt question asked from a place of pure benevolence after seeing that my room was 80% boxes and 20% bed? Was he saying I was a slob? It had better not be the third one, because seriously, I'm in a fightin' mood and I still know where he lives. I have less than a month to get everything I own into a storage unit. This question was asked 20 years ago. Guess how much stuff I have now...

Sooooo...I'm just a little panicked this evening realizing that it is getting so close and I am completely not ready and there is so much to do and it's already the 6th of May and I have to be done by the 29th of May and I can't get an extension and the magnitude of this move is 3 degrees past impossible plus I have to get rid of so much and who is going to buy my cars and is now really the right time to be seeing so many friends and if not now when and of course obviously now because next month they would have to come all the way to Togo and most of them won't even come to the forest and I don't know what to bring because I am used to having everything right nearby and when I leave who is going to send me what I forgot and aren't I supposed to think up someplace clever to leave important things so someone as yet unnamed can get to them when I need them and how come Lizzy is already getting vaccinated when I have not even thought of getting that done and with Survivor ending will I find out who won and why is it that certain parts of my room will not look less cluttered no matter how many things I put in boxes and will my French really come back or will I be 'that volunteer' who needs 100 extra hours of tutoring to the point where they are ready to give up and I have bonded with no one because I am always trying to speak French because no one thought to teach the whole country of Togo English and when it comes time to take a vacation over there I will likely still not have thought of where I would want to go because I never go anyplace but I don't want to not go someplace I just forgot to decide where to go like that dream you have where you are always late for something and can't find the right door but it's not that I'm not trying it's more that I've simply worked too hard on the wrong thing instead of working equally mediocre on everything which is against my nature because I don't leave things unfinished but that's no excuse for not doing something at all so here I am back feeling like I did when I first got my packet and it said Danger Danger do these things right away or else and we really mean or else so take this seriously and I did them but before I did I had a mini meltdown...


Didn't a current PCV advise to not get so wrapped up in what to bring and instead see friends and have a burrito? Does anyone else find it odd that so many PCVs are reporting that their cat died? Other people, when life is calling, say take a message. It would seem that my answering machine was broken, so it's time to get back to packing.

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